Top 10 pregnancy terms that make men (and women) cringe ~ Almost a dad

Top 10 pregnancy terms that make men (and women) cringe

Many pregnancy and childbirth related topics have the ability to make men cringe with speeds nearing that of light, myself included. Often times a particular visual may trigger this reaction. The sight of a baby's head crowning during birthing scene in the movie Knocked Up had that effect on me. I yelled "oh!" so loud in the middle of the theater I sounded like Andrew Dice Clay.

Other times a word or two to is all that is require to make a man recoil in fear. Below are ten of the worst offenders. These words are inevitable as pregnant women like to surprise you by suddenly discussing something in mid-sentence that is best reserved for an ObGyn desk reference manual.

Of the following phrases, some sound worse than they are while others are nasty in expression and by definition. These are legitimate, frequently used terms in pregnancy in birth, so I'm just preparing you expectant fathers. I'm not trying to scare you, just preview what is in store for you. I may offer brief, non-scientific definitions for those terms which are sound worse than they are. For others I will make no further reference, not even a hyperlink. If you're so inclined, look it up yourself as I don't want any part of it.

1. Mucous Plug - kinda like an internal baby cork

2. After Birth - look it up yourself

3. Fundus
- the top of the uterus

4. Cracked nipples
- ouch!

5. Leukorrhea
- look it up yourself

6. Perenial
tear - a tear in perineum (a.k.a 'taint)

7. Bloody show
- occurs within 24 hours of labor, look it up yourself for more detail

8. Membrane rupture
- look it up yourself

9. venous thrombosis
- a blood clot, typically in the leg

10. Any term with "stretching" or "tearing"


Anonymous said...

the fact that you mentioned the crowning scene in "knocked up" made me laugh. I too was shocked when I saw it. in fact so shocked that I screamed. in the middle of the theater.

Anonymous said...

Just wait until you see it live and in action. I will never get the sight of the afterbirth spilling on to the floor. Whoa baby.