Her incredible shrinking bladder ~ Almost a dad

Her incredible shrinking bladder

The pregnant woman's bladder is a logistical nightmare for men. For the duration of the pregnancy you should not plan to do anything with your wife outside of a two-minute travel radius from a bathroom. Don't start any activities which don't allow for breaks every fifteen minutes and do not expect her (or you, by proxy) to sleep through the night without the interruption of multiple bathroom trips. I wish I were exaggerating, but I am not.

Why does she pee so much, you might ask. Well, in technical terms, her bladder's capacity is roughly equivalent to the volume of a thimble and nearly as suited for holding fluids. That, and kidney activity increases to clean her body and remove waste products, which results in frequent urination.

Regardless of the reason, you simply need to know that your estimate of a reasonable amount of time to engage in any activity without requiring a rest room is probably four times longer than she will be able to handle.

I know that sounds ridiculous, and it is, but it's true.

When driving, try and pick a route with clean restrooms along the way and make sure she goes just before you leave the house. It is in your best interest to remind her before you ever walk out the door as her bathroom dilemma will become yours if she needs an emergency pee break. If she says she doesn't have to go, ask her if she's sure and suggest that she try before any departure; picture it as practice for after the baby is born.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

This is God's way of preparing you for having children.