Comments on Almost a dad: Dealing with hormonal pregnant women: don't make t...

lol im glad i found this! my girlfriend who i am v...

2012-01-24T10:23:22.507-08:00

lol im glad i found this! my girlfriend who i am very in love with is 3 months pregnant! dealing with this pregnancy is tough! and what makes it even tougher is that we live 50 miles apart! so we dont get to see eachother that much! my mind is alll over the place at this point lol!cuz stuff is just not adding up on the relationship side! i told her that i am willing to come down to where she lives to see her but she doesnt want me to come down and visit her because she doesnt like where she lives??? so i said that me takin a trip down there doesnt stop u from comin up here? because she likes where i live better and she still stuck with her answer! not only that! before she was pregnant we talked alll the time! text, facebook, skype, phone now i dont hear from her for days and what makes me mad as hell is that i see her talkin to people on facebook but she cant text me back and let me know how she is doing! the only time she talks to me and text me back constantly with positve energy is when she needs money for food! and that right there made me suspicious! like how come just talkin to your boy friend/ the father of our child isnt enough for you to have that same energy to talk to me????? she was super sensitive before she was pregnant! so imagine her now! this is probably the toughest shit ive ever been through!

Holy hell! for the future readers, I have no idea...

2012-01-20T17:22:33.248-08:00

Holy hell! for the future readers, I have no idea if it gets better. I am currently in the spare room trying to keep myself calm. This blog has helped. Today, we got in our third enormous fight because we have too much food in the house. My wonderful wife is 23 weeks in and has never been so mean. Its not constant, It just kicks in every other week or so. I say the right things, do the right things, but she just wants to fight. Pushing the buttons all the ladies know. previous postst are right on, it really isn't funny. I am very patient but I can only take so much. I too want my wife back, I do see her in there sometimes, so I am keeping fingers crossed. Good lucks dads, you are not alone.

Oh my... I thank god for this site. You don'...

2012-01-15T14:20:34.817-08:00

Oh my... I thank god for this site. You don't know my name, but you all would have had I not found this site... It would have been on "Dateline" for the mysterious disappearance of my wife!!! Honestly, someone should have given guys the heads up or a handbook about this crazy hormonal stuff... To quote John Lennon, "nobody told me there'd be days like these!!!!"

man oh man! i was talkin to god and asked him to h...

2012-01-09T07:34:03.543-08:00

man oh man! i was talkin to god and asked him to help me and he brought me to this page! i am a 25 year old and my wife is 34. she is 31 weeks pregnantwith our first child and i thought i was doing something wrong even though i did everything i can besides jump over the moon for my wife which i would try to do that whether she is pregnant or not. i thought i was going crazy seeing how she has changed and thought it might be hormonal but i didnt know it could be this normal for pregnant woman to be like this. people REALLY need to tell someone about the hormones more than anything when getting pregnant. im an athlete so getting cursed out is nothing to me. my mother has pretty in your face attitude as well so i am used to this kind of thing but not from my wife and not when i am busting my butt for her and my soon to be born child. im just glad this ends soon because i love my wife and i miss her and want her back.

i have been reading some of the post on this sit a...

2012-01-06T14:01:16.538-08:00

i have been reading some of the post on this sit and they have really helped me to start to understand a pregnat woman but i can't help to tell you about me.

I have been with my partner for 4 years now. We have been married for one year.
When we first got together we both told each other we really wanted kids. My wife being 33 at the time and me being 27. We talked about this because the womans body starts to stop working and we both really want kids. well three and a half years pass and still no baby. We tried I.V.F but it did not work. And with the hormons and the stress that came with this i could not take being pushed away so i had an afer and the wife found out. not the best thing to do and i do feel really bad for it but we talked and sorted it out. to this day i have not cheated again like i promised. but now the wife told me just before x-mas to meat for a coffee in my work break.. this has never happend before in 4 years so i wanted to know what was wrong. we meet and she hold me she was having a baby. I was so happy so over the moon but then came a BUT.
I am sorry it is not your baby she told me. i lost it i wanted to kill her to hit he but i could not do it because of the baby and because i love her. she is now 12 weeks into the pregnansy and all i try is to be near her but i get pushed away again. i can't bring up the fact the baby is not mine because she tells me it is her and the baby or leave. I love my wife with all my hart and i know she loves me. but i cant take the hurt she has given me. i know it is the hormons at the moment but i hurt so much. Our sex life has stoped now for 10 weeks. i can't tutch her or even talk about sex. she tells me to go and sleep with someone else to get red of my hormons. i wish there was someone i could talk to to help me..

I really can relate to you guys. My girl is about...

2011-12-24T21:13:42.764-08:00

I really can relate to you guys. My girl is about 7 months and all I can think is we never argued this much since we been together which has been 4 years and some months. Everything is her way (the right way). I'm a very patient person but by far caught me off guard. Not left field you in right field but America Antarctic caught me off guard. I feel like one of them cartoon characters just standing there getting yelled at saying nothing but collecting all the spit and saliva and can do nothing but walk away to sqeegy my face. But I been in there this long though. I just need her to realize I'm trying all that I can. Coming home from catering to her 24/7 dealing with a bull$&@! Job being as though I'm the only one working plus making sure her 3 year old is cared for also, dividing the attention between the two plus being exhausted from work is alot but I still do but the constant arguing isn't making me feel no better, this is my 1st child and I'm trying, lord knows I am

@ anonymous Porsche mom, his behavior does sound e...

2011-12-17T08:49:43.901-08:00

@ anonymous Porsche mom, his behavior does sound escapist. I don't know how old he is so don't know if it's mid-life, but think he is having trouble with the reality of the situation. Sounds like he's got some pre-child living he thinks he needs to get out of his system, but he needs to man-up. It may be that he'll just eternally test drive and never actually buy one, but he needs to be aware of how his behavior is effecting you and the potential negative impacts. He doesn't sound like a horrible guy, just a little off base. Either way, I wish you the best of luck and let me know if you have any questions or concerns.

So I am 18 weeks pregnant and live in new York cit...

2011-12-17T07:04:02.289-08:00

So I am 18 weeks pregnant and live in new York city, my husband has become obsessed with buying a vintage porsche. He searches and goes to test drive constantly. Did I mention we live in NYC, where we currently have no car due to lack of and high cost of parking and that we have never needed one. This car will be his alone as it is not a baby friendly ride. He has worked the last two weekends and is off today test driving another one. Is this normal, did my pregnancy trigger a mid life crisis or force him back to his teenage years? He is very sweet and helpful but this one issue is making me feel sad and alone like he is not really planning for a real baby, but making plans for his new automotive child? I love him and want him to be happy but friends and family think he is acting selfish and immature. Not sure how big a deal to make of this, even though I know it is not a good decision right now.

My wife is pregnant and my father-in-law is having...

2011-12-12T19:05:48.434-08:00

My wife is pregnant and my father-in-law is having temper tantrums and mood swings!!!! normally he is sensible, but he is acting crazy these days

my wife is killing me, since she is pregnant. she ...

2011-12-12T18:48:08.111-08:00

my wife is killing me, since she is pregnant. she lives a few months here and a few in europe, she is in europe now. and 10weeks pregnant, every phone call ends up in an argument, mostly from her, and she calls me the meanest things i have ever heard. she wants to leave me now and threatens me with divorce, and just 10 weeks ago we were in love!!!!! i dont know how to handle it.... its also that her father is acting like he is pregnant!!!! adding to the fuel and driving me nuts....

ATJ, that is an amazing post! It sums up my experi...

2011-12-07T04:26:16.388-08:00

ATJ, that is an amazing post! It sums up my experience with my girlfriend completely. She is now at week 32 and i've been getting almost a few apologies here and there. I'm so glad I read your post, it has brightened up my day no end. I can see that light! Thank you :)

pregnancy is a crazy gig; i'm 20 weeks now; wa...

2011-12-02T21:26:20.091-08:00

pregnancy is a crazy gig; i'm 20 weeks now; was unplanned but with a loving partner... once the morning sickness started things got bad; real bad and i swirled into a downward spiral of deep dark depression. but my man was always there.

we had always had an amazing sex life, i loved the smell of him, the look of him, everything about him. and then i got pregnant. and guys - it's hard to understand - but the world as we once know it turns on it's head. EVERYTHING CHANGES. sights, smells, tastes, digestion, feeling constantly sick, exhausted, out of control, our body is no longer our own - it's a vessel for another life to grow.

the crazy hormones can effect any of us pregnant ones: and you men unfortunately take the brunt of it. how i admire you all. in the face of adversity, of hostility, of point blank refusal to even kiss, or talk, or touch... my man remained beside me.

THIS TOO SHALL PASS... it does get better. the hormones still rage and we're still impossible and demanding and crazy. but it does. get. better.

have faith and hope men.
you are our rocks.
we NEED YOU. even when we chuck you out the door and try to break up with you.

we want to be secure. we crave it. this is just mother natures way of testing you.

sorry about that.
much love to all.
men and women.
and to all those babies out there who look like they will be born to some pretty amazing fathers.

..my other half is completely off her chuck...a lo...

2011-11-13T06:26:30.299-08:00

..my other half is completely off her chuck...a logical & civil conversation is a pipe dream....

2 months to go...i am talking more frequent walks to leave the intense crazy behind for an hour...for we all have to swim in that pool till the little bundle of joy arrives and normality returns.... :-D

One book got me ready for fatherhood more than any...

2011-11-06T07:36:48.492-08:00

One book got me ready for fatherhood more than any other - "The Continuum Concept." And I think that what prepared me more for fatherhood than any "parenting/self-help" book was further study into anthropology, biology and evolutionary psychology. All expectant fathers should read the works of Robert Coles and Jean Piaget. Men need a larger cultural frame of reference, as they ultimately just need to stand around the fire with a spear and have really good eyesight. Or get chinese takeout at the drop of a hat.

My wife is 3 months pregnant and acts pretty much ...

2011-11-01T05:38:49.742-07:00

My wife is 3 months pregnant and acts pretty much the same way she has since we got married -- irrational, demanding, and disrespectful. So you at least have the comfort of knowing your wife's psychosis is temporary and hormonally driven.

You see it in the movies and on tv and you think.....

2011-10-24T06:39:08.792-07:00

You see it in the movies and on tv and you think... "It's a dramatization. It can't really be that bad!" And then you realize they've been sugar-coating it. When the pregnant wife yells in a sitcom, it's always funny! In real life - IT SUCKS! But as several people have pointed out - dealing with the hormones themselves sucks worse than dealing with the wild roller coaster of emotions, so suck it up, guys. When my wife was in her first trimester, she would start crying at BIZARRE times. The dog didn't finish all his food... tears. She can't find her house keys... tears. I didn't take out the trash... tears. And my wife is TOUGH, so at first I couldn't figure out what the heck was going on. Then we found out that she was prenant... AAAHHHHHHH! NOW it makes sense. So I read up on the whole hormone issue. Grabbed a hold of the safety bar and rode the hormone coaster through week 13, and then, like clockwork, her hormones balanced and she was my darling, lovely wife again. YES! I made it! I survived!! What??? It's not over?!?! NOOOOOOOO!!!! That's right. We hit week 18, and I discovered that I was still on the coaster... it was just one of those smooth patches that they put in there to sucker you in before the really big drop! And this time she's not crying, which in retrospect would be a welcome emotion. This time she is yelling! Uh oh, hold on tighter... but not too tight or she'll yell. I called my sister, who has had two kids, to ask how long this is going to go on. Sis - "You're at 20 weeks, right?" Me - "Yes" (hoping she's about to say it should end any day) Sis - "Bro, you're half way there. Pregnancy is 40 weeks." Me - "What?!" Sis - "And then it gets really bad for about another month! You think this is bad? Wait til that four week period after she delivers!!" Not to worry though. There really is a light at the end of the tunnel. It's called a baby! And yes, I know my wife will one day be back to her lovely, tough, yet caring, self. I just have to stay on the wild ride for roughly 24 more weeks, and I have to remember what my wife keeps reminding me... "YOU DID THIS TO ME!!!"

I am 14 weeks prego and outrageously horny, I cant...

2011-10-19T21:46:32.889-07:00

I am 14 weeks prego and outrageously horny, I cant go a day without thinking about sex . My boyfriend works about 70hr a week, so when he is home I cant stay away from him. I feel bad, cause we have sex and I want more and more and more.... So I think it makes him feel bad. And then I get all mad and tell him he cant satisfy me. WOW right? I guess I just want to know if any other men have went throuh this with their pregnant girlfriends and what did they do/did when she was left unsatisfyed. Or if you are a pregnant girlfriend what do I do about this whole horney all the time thing? This has been going on for about a week now and I am even getting on my nerves over it.

Thank you for this website. It does make you feel ...

2011-09-30T23:43:25.675-07:00

Thank you for this website. It does make you feel a little better and not alone. I love my wife, but she has become very cold and has told me such things today, that I have seriously attempted killing myself. But I see from this site, that it cannot be all her speaking but the hormones. This was an unplanned pregrancy, but I love her and I am trying to support her as much as I can. I make very little money and cannot offer her too much. Sometimes I think if we are so stupid to even tolerate this for 1 day. I hope there is light at the end of this dark tunnel.

Oh my goodness my story told over and over. I'...

2011-09-11T23:37:06.333-07:00

Oh my goodness my story told over and over. I'm totally in love with my girl. She is 9 weeks and I am just glad I read this. We had a little battle tonight after she asked me to go to the store, and put gas in the car. So I did, then I was assaulted for spending 45 dollars. Lol I was lost. At times really do need to bite my tongue more. I love her so much, and only want the best for her. I try so hard and it's hardly ever right. I had to leave for work tonight I work 3rd shift, with her balling. It is the hardest thing to do. I just wrapped her in my arms, told her I love her, and to just breath and to get some rest. In Jesus name I pray, I know if I trust in the lord all will be ok. Def the hardest thing I have ever had to encounter is this. Thank you again for helping me not feel so alone, and for a few laughs. Namely "prego-saurus" lol. God bless!!!

Very nice post, man. My wife is 10 weeks in but p...

2011-09-08T07:12:56.852-07:00

Very nice post, man. My wife is 10 weeks in but plagued with extreme vomiting, which has made me the bad guy in spurts for enforcing a fairly strict regime of regular snacking and hydration. This morning, I came back to find that she had barely touched her cerial and was complaining about not feeling good. I made the mistake of chastising her about regular eating and drinking, and how since for some reason, she is unable to see the correlation between food/fluids intake, and her state of wellness, I have to the bad guy. She burst into tears, begged me to go away; I didn't right away and instead told her how much I loved her, how worried I was, how my priority was to make her feel better etc. She just closed up so I eventually left. Will go back in a few hours with more food and hot chocolate or something. Then usually at the end of the day, she has a wave of appreciation and love for me, so when this stuff happens... I just do my best to get out of the male problem solver mode, and into the non-rational unconditional empathy zone :)

Thank you Bill! Thanks for creating this blog and ...

2011-09-06T07:31:59.039-07:00

Thank you Bill! Thanks for creating this blog and many thanks to everyone else for all the replies to it. I am not alone in this. I have been getting to a very low point with all this and I was getting worried for my mental health. About 10 years back, I had severe depression which resulted in a suicide attempt, luckily I was rubbish at it and survived. It was good that I did survive because I got together with the love of my dreams last year and then we found out that we were going to have a child. A perfect dream come true!
Then it all changed, very similar to the anonymous post on April 13th, 2010 at 8:10pm. She hardly shows any love or affection in any way. Previously, we couldn’t be separated, we always cuddled up together or sat on the sofa holding hands, a kiss goodbye in the morning, a kiss at night on my return home from work. Now she seems to be repulsed by me, she seems to flinch even if I just gently caress her shoulder. She has blown up at me and said that she doesn’t want this child and regrets ever meeting me, she did retract that afterwards but still doesn’t show any affection. I thought I was caught in a trap, imprisoned and secluded from her life and the baby’s life. I’ve tried to talk about it with her but she says there is nothing wrong and it’s all in my mind. I really didn’t know what I have done wrong, I have not been sleeping well and I was getting dark thoughts like I had many years ago, I could see the tell tale signs of a depression coming on. This is the last thing that I want to do and I was really getting very low. Reading this today has given me some hope that this will all change next January. It is very mentally demanding and I have smiled my way through many verbal assaults but I never realised things would get this bad.
I wish some more of the posters on this blog previously could repost how they are getting on now, whether it did all change back to the good times after birth? I hope so. I can see a glimmer of hope at the end of this dark tunnel.

I loved this post! It left me giggling and on the...

2011-08-29T12:10:03.516-07:00

I loved this post! It left me giggling and on the verge of tears at the same time. My husband could relate to this as he's had to deal with meltdowns that seem to come from out of nowhere over the past few weeks. He's been an incredibly patient crusader and just a great partner in all of this. I'm grateful for blogs like yours that add humor to an emotional time in our lives.

I read this and experience this on a constant basi...

2011-08-26T22:10:20.890-07:00

I read this and experience this on a constant basis. My girlfriend is 13 weeks in and she completely flies off the handles for next to no reason, becomes completely irrational, finds a lot of complete strangers despicable, and will cut her nose off to spite her face. She pushes my buttons and threatens ending our relationship constantly. I try to bite my tongue and never hear a thank you or a sorry, all I hear is complete an utter crazy.
I also can't believe some of the responses from women on here that are laughing about the post? Really, it is not funny. It is horrible in every way. I understand you feel crazy all the time and your body is going through changes but why do you have to drag down your man with you? If I felt bad, or crazy, I would not want to drag my significant other down with me. Get over it, stop worrying about "being fat". We don't care and it's not fat, it's our child- and if you did gain fat, it's not a permanent thing. I used to think really low of every guy that has ever left their pregnant partner, but now I'm starting to think quite a few are forced out. Good grief.

brother, i wrote the post above you, and i too am ...

2011-08-24T12:53:34.696-07:00

brother, i wrote the post above you, and i too am at a loss....i have had no word from my girlfriend, (now ex girlfriend) since may 5th, she is now 26 weeks pregnant....i would love to know anything regarding my unborn child...how does somebody justify for such actions, this once in a life time event...i don't know..
good luck with your situation...

Hi all. Me and my girlfriend are 11 weeks through ...

2011-08-23T06:55:25.324-07:00

Hi all. Me and my girlfriend are 11 weeks through our first pregnancy. after finding out just two weeks after our holiday in her home town (Hungary) i'am English and we both currently live in England. As of the last week she has become very distant,cold and unloving towards myself. After we have been so happy with each other since we started the relationship 7 months ago. this hot me very hard. Since then i have been reading up on hormones and what to expect over the next year. Seems to be that it is very much so, the hormones that i call the DEVIL! I dont live with her but we have spent almost every night together since day one. And we had started to plan moving into our own house. She is now saying that she does not want to live together and that she NEEDS space. I fully understand that and i believe that i have taken this the best way possible, considering my state of mind right now. Her family have told me to just hold tight and be patient. then hopefully soon she will return to her normal self. However it would be a massive help if others could give me some guidance and help to remain sane for throughout this battle. Thanks!