Comments on Almost a dad: Why pregnant women yell at you

Same experience. What I find funny is men are alwa...

2012-02-10T19:41:25.406-08:00

Same experience. What I find funny is men are always supposed to be understanding of this problem and that problem....my period....I'm pregnant(Being grumpy about a child we both wanted but we know who was pushing that issue....what the hell?)...and the last excuse that lasts from whenever she says it starts to whenever she decides it ends is menopause!!! When a man gets grumpy and speaks his mind he is an inconsiderant asshole that could never understand what it is like to be a woman. Right back at ya. What SOME women tend to forget is although we are different we are still both human beings and there are more things that make us the same than different. Nobody likes getting shit on. The I love you's and you look great should be apart of every day as do the flowers and date nights and everything else...but if your wife is trying to treat you like shit and walk all over you because of_______excuse...grow some balls and respectfully let her know where the rubber meets the road. Any guy who trys to appease a verbally abusive woman whith I love you's and you are beautiful type comments is setting themselves up for a long road of servitude and abuse. Its all about respect both ways.

This is an incredible site to have found. My ex-f...

2012-02-10T13:51:18.161-08:00

This is an incredible site to have found. My ex-fiance just left me. She's 23 weeks. We've been fighting since day 1. I've hoarded all the guilt on every occasion. We've broke up numerous times. This last fight I had enough. She text me while I was at my new job that she can't wait to have another penis inside her and that she wants to lick it up and down. I flipped out!! I left my work, stole our car while it was parked at her work and told her if she cheats on me I'll kill her dog. I'm actually a peaceful person believe it or not. But now I'm a violent person and has officially left me. 3 days prior to that we had our deepest and most intellectually passionate conversation since the news of her being pregnant. It happened so fast. Now, she's removed herself from the lease and all her belongings are gone. I finally spoke to her yesterday thinking that a week later she might've calmed down. Nope. Now I won't be in the delivery room and will not be able to help pick out a name. I'm a wreck.

P.S. the best way I can describe her when she is ...

2012-02-06T19:51:08.611-08:00

P.S. the best way I can describe her when she is pregnant is it makes her worst Period seem like Bliss. Yes, she gets that crazy, I'm not kidding you. Again, good luck first time Fathers......

My wife and I have 3 kids with one on the way and ...

2012-02-06T19:49:13.563-08:00

My wife and I have 3 kids with one on the way and every time she gets pregnant she becomes a person I don't know. She experiences intense bouts of rage and nothing I say helps, only makes it worse. I have sworn to myself that I will never go through this again (it's a terrible experience) I am not sure that all women are affected the same way but my wife makes faces that seriously scare me. Good luck guys, thanks for this Blog, very big help.

im so glad i found this site. i've felt like ...

2012-01-29T23:31:33.755-08:00

im so glad i found this site.
i've felt like just crying the last few days.
it just seems to get worst and worst day by day,
i try to do everything for her and do everything right.
i try to get her everything she needs and wants but having no appreciation for what i do and just being belittled about it is getting to me.
haha the good thing is she wants sex as much as i do.
the only bad thing about that is before or after sex she doesn't want to be touched at all. at times i apprently make her sick by it. idk and the sickness after sex. i feel awful afterwards cuz i feel like i couldve said no and saved her from being sick but haha im a guy and you know. but i do take care of her. i'll do anything for her i love her to death.
im just glad this isn't uncommon! i thought i or her were going crazy!

To kevin i'm right there with you. i'm not...

2012-01-29T23:10:33.365-08:00

To kevin
i'm right there with you. i'm not violent exspeacially towards my gf. i mean thats why were with them we love em and we don't wanna be upset with em. but i totally understand. i can do everything perfect i mean spot on and say idk for example she asked me to get her something to drink. haha i said "ok" and that did it. it was hell i try not to blow up but sometimes when its over nothing and im still doing what you ask. it gets to be to much, and it's hard for me to be quiet cause she'll just keep on, and if i say i love you or your cute i feel like shit cause nothings said back, and if i do argue i feel like an ass cause i know it's not her fault but it's hard for me to wrap my mind around that its the pregnancy. i know she would never do that any other time.

bottom line just hang in there. say your sorry as many times as you need too even if you really don't want to. and always say i love you. or try.

thats my goal everyday is to try to make her say it back cause after she says it she calms down idky but it works. just gotta find out what'll calm her down man. just hang in there.

this makes me feel so much better. were not comple...

2012-01-28T23:13:06.510-08:00

this makes me feel so much better.
were not completely positive if were pregnant or not yet. she's taking a htp tomorrow morning. she has been delaying it to make sure her cycle wasn't coming.
but i'm positive that she is preggo. exspeacially over the last few days. she'll be "i love you" and 5 min. later. i'm getting yelled at because there's a wendys wrapper in my car. she was wondering why it was there. i didn't do anything i didn't purposely put the wrapper there to upset her. At first i got so irrataed just the fact that i honestly didn't do anything. it started a fight (over a wendys wrapper) and about 10 min later. i just stopped and thought shes pregnant. so i cooled down and told her she was cute and i loved her and that i was sorry, and everything was a-ok after that.

i thought i was gonna go crazy, and right now it's hard to wrap my head and feelings around this she's right and i'm wrong about everything. i felt like crying cause for a moment i felt like i really did do something wrong....well i did.... i wasn't understanding.

I really don't no how to handle her I love her...

2012-01-23T07:09:30.175-08:00

I really don't no how to handle her I love her to death and this is the my second child she is a mix of just about all the worse cases everybody has posted hyperemesis everything I do annoys her I just need help she is on fifteen weeks and last night I blew up bad I ended up breaking two doors because I was so mad and I don't get like that I am not violent it scared the hell outta me I don't wanna lose her it's just hard when ur told ur dumb ur a retard ur everything beside there man after ready all the posts on here I kind of realized I have been a little selfish to her needs and to how she feels so I'm going to try some stuff i grew up being told to never back down well it kinda has made it bad i wish i could just swallow my pride any advice from anybody on how to show my girlfriend i do care and i am sorry for being a selfish ass

Being pregnant is something you men will never und...

2012-01-13T15:47:57.927-08:00

Being pregnant is something you men will never understand!!! I am almost at 8 months, and I feel the burn. It's so unfair, and you feel like everything is your responsibility, but you can't control your actions or your body like before you were pregnant. It's emotionally tolling, and just not fun.

The other night I dumped out a bag that had bathroom supplies from a recent trip, and my fiancee asked me to pick it all back up! I cannot bend over anymore, and he just does not get that.... He says things to me like "If you're hungry make yourself food like I do, you should be able to feed yourself" UMMMM hello? I am pregnant, and have a hyperemesis on top (makes you sick feeling all the time) I need help sometimes!

Just understand that this is the most confusing and emotional time a woman, or person for that matter, will ever go through. Making a person with your body pushing it out through your vagina, then feeding it with your breast is not an easy task.

My girlfriend just hit the 11 week mark and has be...

2012-01-06T13:22:56.096-08:00

My girlfriend just hit the 11 week mark and has been evil since day one. One day I'm told if I have a problem to address it when it happens the next day I'm Told if I have a problem to do myself a favor and keep it to myself. 5 minutes later I'm the best thing that ever happened to her as a remote control goes flying by my head. For the first two weeks I tried to make sense of it while avoiding being pinched punched stabbed bit and belittled. I'm constantly yelled at in public and in front of friends and family, as well as any other uncomfortable setting you can picture. I find myself taking 1-2 hour long showers and doing a lot more overtime and LOVING it. Fortunately sex isn't an issue she can't get enough although 5 minutes after having sex ahe complains we don't have sex anymore. It's a bizarre little world I'm living in right now and a huge learning experience. Some key things I've learned about myself are that I'm an idiot, every word that comes out of my mouth is dumber than the last I don't do enough I always smell and I'm better off dead. Love pregnancy it's been a pleasure.

My husband has been trying his best to please me a...

2012-01-03T07:08:11.908-08:00

My husband has been trying his best to please me and does things around the house helping as much as he can. And yet he is being yelled at for not doing things to meet my high standards or for little annoying thins I would normally not notice.
I can be very irritating and abusive at times.
One thing I cannot understand it that I do not yell at work at my boss or my clients and so why do I need to take off on my husband whom I love so much?
Can anyone address this mistery?

Thanks, everyone, for taking the time to post on t...

2012-01-02T05:27:44.060-08:00

Thanks, everyone, for taking the time to post on this blog. Reading this has reassured me (somewhat) that my pregnant wife's mood swings are (somewhat) normal.

My wife is 8 months pregnant now and I assumed the mood swings that she had in her first couple of months were over. How wrong was I? The mood swings are back with a vengeance and I am having an incredibly tough time dealing with being treated like a piece of shit on a piece of shit's shoe.

Everything, and I mean EVERYTHING I do leads to criticism. I simply cannot do anything right and when I try to argue my case I am met with facetious comebacks such as 'yes, you're always right, i'm always wrong.' which is annoying because that is quite often the truth!

This afternoon my pregnant wife sulked for an hour because I wouldn't buy her a Blythe doll (she's 27 and we're expecting a boy). This evening she blamed me for the new ironing board not being as good as the old one. The old one that I said was perfectly fine, but she wanted a new one.

I really am trying my best, after an argument last night about bathing our baby I took the initiative to try and smooth things over this morning by nipping out while she was asleep and getting her breakfast to serve to her in bed. This was met with a grunt and of course a 'thank you' was nowhere in sight.

I am now more anxious than anything for this pregnancy to be over so I can see my little man's face and hopefully my wife's bat-sh*t crazy behaviour will come to an end!

Any words of encouragement are welcome, if I don't see a light at the end of the tunnel soon I may have to be extracted by a rescue team!

I live with a pregnant beast from HELL! It's t...

2011-12-23T12:26:06.470-08:00

I live with a pregnant beast from HELL! It's to the point that I regret the pregnancy - and i realize that sounds horrible, but that's just how I feel right now.

This is the WORST thing that could have happened!

(con't) I do feel bad for my husband and alw...

2011-12-10T17:41:33.647-08:00

(con't)

I do feel bad for my husband and always apologize later on. At the same time however I am the one growing a baby, and having to feel all these weird frustrating ways. My thoughts are often contradictory and I constantly change my mind, I feel possessed!!! I guess I am a little, by the baby and hormones!!!

Husbands, and boyfriends listen up! I know it's awful to deal with, but trust me feeling like you hate the person you love sucks too. I want you to know however that your wife will return to normal after being pregnant. Not instantly, and always look out for post partumn depression!
Keep saying your "yes dears" and "I love you, you are beautiful" because even though it seems like all we care about is the negative... The good counts too, and we'll remember all the good you still did even in our darkest pregnancy moments.
To love someone is to love all of them, the good times and the awful times.

I found this looking up "pregnancy irritable&...

2011-12-10T17:39:35.699-08:00

I found this looking up "pregnancy irritable".
I am currently 8 months pregnant and this is my second pregnancy. I thought the first time around my hormones were bad, but this time my moods have been black and white since the beginning. I HATE the way I feel a lot of the time, I often wish I could crawl right out of my own skin it feels so wrong.
My own 2 year old daughter can annoy me even when she is being cute, my husband it feels like he can't do anything right. Sometimes the mere presence of him or my daughter can irritate me, so I usually retreat to my bedroom whenever possible. My husband is a trooper, I've picked arguments and ranted about everything and anything wrong with our house, money, life in general.
A good tip is to make sure blood sugar is stable, I find the longer I wait to eat the worse it gets (and I am more likely to have arguments that make no sense).

With my first pregnancy I felt like sex more often, with this one we've hardly made love at all. Even if I've wished and WANTED too my body was no in agreement. Either being to sensitive, or touching feels wrong.

(Con't...)

Incredibly helpful to me. It's 5:30 am here i...

2011-12-08T02:55:34.803-08:00

Incredibly helpful to me. It's 5:30 am here in NC. My gf and I have bee together for ~ a year. I was in a 4 year relationship when we met, and actually cheated on my ex with my current gf before ending it with ex after 3 months. Moved in together 3 months later. Now, I've never been that guy to cheat, but truly believe this girl and I are meant to be together. She's a radiant light in my world. We've been so in-tune with each other in the past, able to communicate well.
We're at week 11-12. The past couple weeks, things have changed. She's distant, moments of looking at me with love and affection, followed by days of her just being real tired, sick, not attentive or affectionate at all. The past week has been really stressful. Here's some background: I'm 37, she's 26. She was pregnant at 19, had a miscarriage at 5 months. At the time, she lived with her boyfriend and another guy. BF was absent, other guy was a big emotional help. Well, other guy is here visiting from Europe for 2 weeks. And since he's arrived, things have gotten rougher. Part my insecurities over her wanting to hang with him over me & her being distant and sad. Also my insecurities over this guy being a 'rock' for her in the past, and seeming like he's giving her relationship advice based on him knowing me just a couple days. Note on this guy: Cool dude, good friend to her, but has also fathered something like 6-8 kids that he doesn't financially support at all. So there's a little lack of respect there, and don't think he's the best person to be giving a pregnant girl relationship advice. Add to that some fights we've had, and her saying how she's not sure about us. It's been hard.
Now some clarity. I trust her, don't believe there's any cheating or anything at all like that with this guy. She's doesn't yet act like she hates me, or been physical with me. But she has seriously withdrawn. Really sad. Really questioning us. I've tried to talk with her about this, being rational and calm. But it seems to backfire, as ants turn into elephants.
Then came this blog this evening, and I'm very appreciative for it. We're not the only ones going through this. Here's my takeaway:
Don't unload on her. She has enough going on, don't add to it. Suck it up, journal, talk to friends and family, but don't put more on her. Trust your relationship. Be strong, weather the storm. Masterbate. Don't fall into a negative cycle. Make up to each other as soon as things have calmed down, try not to go to bed angry. Reassure her. Tell her you love her. Definitely step up housework (my girl was a housecleaning BEAST, which I'm not used to, having been used to doing this myself. She leaves a mess everywhere now. Be ok with that, and help out).
In other words, remember why you're together in the first place, set your sails for that spot and weather the storm. If it's meant to work, it will. It it doesn't, then you tried and can look at yourself in the mirror each morning.

worried father, First off. The first abortion mig...

2011-12-07T21:55:21.594-08:00

worried father,

First off. The first abortion might have been traumatic and left her feeling that men are untrustworthy. Also, depending on what type of women her mom is you might have to contend with her bullshit agenda. You need to nip this problem quick. She is having second thoughts because she has uncertainty of many things. She is carrying this child how does she know you wont cheat, be an asshole, if you wont break up. Everything and anything will cross her mind to fight back. Gain control of this situation and help her.

Drop flowers off at her door. Food. Yummy fruit drinks. with a brief simple note. "Always love seeing you. I'm always here if you need me." Every note add a little more security. "I have been 110% ready for you, waited a long time for you, I will continue to wait as long as I have to". Maybe drop off an informative book on pregnancy that has a section on hormones.

Don't panic, don't freeze, don't backlash. What u say is important more so than tone/emotion, save that until you finalize your point.

This is helped me so much however, my story is ali...

2011-11-27T06:57:20.482-08:00

This is helped me so much however, my story is alittle bit worse so I am hoping someone can offer some advice to me.
so here is my story me and my I guess now ex-fiance, (She is 20 I am 22), met at work she was looking to get out of a cheating relationship that was going no where. and we hit it off right away she moved in with me after our first date (I know really fast but it was love I promise) any way we have been dating for 4 months relativly short I know but we both felt we had found what we needed. We decided that we wanted to get married so we got engaged, then we decided that we wanted a baby so we started trying. We found out she was pregnat and everything was bliss both of us were so happy, she wanted to go tell my mom right away. However in week 7 out of no where while we were carving pumpkins she started to cry, now she had been very emotional the weeks before so I figured it was nothing. When I asked what was wrong she said she just needed to go to her mother's. Well she left and called later saying we needed to talk and she just went off on me about something she found on my computer which I had openly admitted to her that it was a joke my friend had tried to play on me before, this issue had already been settled before and she had dropped it but now brought it up again full force. So with that calmed down she begain saying she just needed time and space, well me bing the idiot I am this confused me and I called her (probably too much) everytime she said that she just needed time, I would ask her if she still loved me and she would respond with a yes she did and always would, but she felt like we spent too much time together and it ruined us. But that soon turned into her saying she was sorry for wasting my time and that it was all over. I didn't understand what had happened and know it has turned into her screaming at me everytime we try to talk saying I annoy her that I was a rebound, she never loved me only faked it, she wasn't happy about the baby she was only trying to make herself feel that she was happy about it. Now her friend is trying to convince her successfully that I was a mistake she feel in love with me too fast then when she got pregnant she realized she didn't really love me. (Alittle back story, she use to be married to this guy but said that she never loved him only married him because she felt bad about him losing his job and she couldn't say no, now she got pregnant with this guy but had it aborted after 3 weeks when she started to date the cheating bf. I have asked and she said I was different from this guy but I'm not sure if this is a pattern with her or not. the fact that she decided to keep this baby I feel is a good sign, now back to the story....) I feel like this is just a pregnancy thing and that hormones and alittle fear of the unknow is to blame for this but she swears it isn't the hormones, that this is how she really feels. I just don't know I need help on this, could this just be hormones? will she come back? She is 12 week in now and I miss her so badly I feel lost and so hurt I want her back I don't want the baby growing up in seprate houses or worse, calling someone else dady!!! Now I am 100% sure this is my baby there is no chance that it isn't so please don't respond with anything like that. But please help me any advice is helpful

I have had the same experience. My fiancé was shou...

2011-11-13T09:53:19.922-08:00

I have had the same experience. My fiancé was shouting at me because she said I did not do the cleaning the way she liked it. She is a hormonal time bomb. Sometimes most of the time she is the best most nice girl on the planet then boooooomb she is telling me that I'm an arse for going to get groceries at supermarket.

what i don't get is how everything is up to th...

2011-11-12T19:45:05.818-08:00

what i don't get is how everything is up to the father-to-be... hormones are going to make women more irritable, and everyone knows that, yet there's never any advice given to women about the importance of taking a few deep breaths, keeping in mind their hormonal condition, or anything else that could make the whole thing easier for both. i'm not saying women are at fault and i know that's not the case, but it should be half and half - women should try a little harder to control themselves, and men should try a little harder to be especially patient.

The only place online I've found that mirrors ...

2011-10-25T03:55:54.770-07:00

The only place online I've found that mirrors my situation. It's good to know I'm not alone but it's still hard to deal with. My story ...

We went abroad for one last go at IVF treatment and, glory be, it was successful. But since returning home our relationship has spiralled downwards into hell. Most conversations seem to start with the words ‘why haven’t you ...’ and then rapidly descend into arguments. And into these she drags everything I have ever said or done wrong over the past eight years, regardless of whether or not it might be relevant.

More worryingly, there is a progression into an irrational world where I’m apparently flirting with the grandmother next door because I say hello when I see her and have had occasion to speak to her regarding a possible house extension. Finally there is the nuclear button, when some of my oldest friends and assorted family members come in for a tirade of abuse. Instead of looking to the future and our first child, old grudges get endlessly raked over, nothing is ever satisfactorily resolved and separation is beginning to look a distinct possibility.

I get exasperated and angry when she repeats some of her wilder allegations and she then says I don’t respect her and she doesn’t want the child being brought up with a father who behaves like that. I know I have my own problems to deal with and, at her urging, have been seeing a counsellor. But after five or six sessions, she’s decided she hasn’t seen any change in me and it’s not working so I should give it up. I think it is working, if slowly: you can’t alter years of behaviour patterns in a few hours. I suggested you can’t change yourself until you know yourself and I was getting that much out of the sessions. My counsellor is a woman and now my wife is suspicious of what I’m getting up to with her.

It’s enough to make me want to cry. There are not and never have been any other women, I am trying to change my behaviour – to organise my time better, not to react so defensively – but it feels like the harder I try to do these things the worse our situation gets. She should be as stress-free as possible after several failed IVF cycles, but my mere presence often seems to be the cause of her stress. After yet another row, half of me wants to walk out, thinking it would be the simplest way of resolving the stress issue and keeping my sanity; the other half wants to stay and be a good and supportive father. Or, a desperate idea, maybe I could just make myself scarce for the next five months and return after the baby’s born …

Difficult as it is, I assume the hormones thing will pass, but some stuff has been said that can’t be unsaid and every row tears down another few bricks in the wall of the marriage: respect and trust are going missing, separate bedrooms are in danger of becoming the norm. A previous trip to Relate came to nothing, as she seemed to expect the counsellor there to hand out answers like antibiotics and quite possibly to attribute blame to one or other of us for the difficulties in our relationship. I don’t live in such a black and white world and I increasingly wonder whether we can ever really be compatible and a happy family.

It really does make ya feel better to know that ot...

2011-10-23T11:45:29.047-07:00

It really does make ya feel better to know that other people are going thru the same crazziness you are...... i hate drama so i swear she creates it to just get under my skin. i have anger issues, went to conselling as a kid to control it. well she is doing a bang up job of testing my limits... as the one guy said my counting to ten has gotten to atleast 60, but then you get yelled at for not caring. NO i just dont wanna fight every day!... well thanks for letting me vent this blog really has been helpful.

My wife has 3 weeks till baby. She has been a real...

2011-10-20T22:30:42.317-07:00

My wife has 3 weeks till baby. She has been a really awful ,super critical demon. Seems I cant do or say anything right. I do everything but she insists I do nothing. She is name calling and 'hating' on everything. I am a lover, but she is making me a fighter. She has pushed me to places I've never been - and not in a good way. She uses any info i ever gave her about me against me. Holding my whole past against me. She did this before pregnancy too. I feel as doomed as my own parents who only managed 20 years because of all the lies. I gotta break the cycle. I have been off work for 18 months from spinal surgery and I need to get out of the house. Nobody is hiring at the moment so we're stuck together till the economy shapes up. Come on Greece!!!!! Get it together.!!!! She thinks other women like Beyonce for eg are big fat ugly people. I haven't heard the word 'ugly' ever being used so much. I can't stand it! She seems jealous or just snobby. Not my type AT ALL !

I hear you all. I am going through the exact same ...

2011-10-20T09:22:48.929-07:00

I hear you all. I am going through the exact same thing. We met, fell in love , madly in love, we were special... Then she got pregnant, we decided that since we loved eachother, we would go through with it, even though we didn´t know eachother that well. After e few weeks, the tiredness came, then th "i dont wanna be touched" period, then the period where i woke her up, then the no kissing period, all of a sudden I lost my key to her place, my clothes were in a bag. we are still seing eachother once a week, but are not together anymore. I miss her, I miss us, I cant do anything right. I am glad I found this site, i am not alone, thank god! I do however need to find out what happens after the birth and the following months . Does it get better? or do I start looking for an exorcist? John

This site has helped me cope. I have been with my ...

2011-10-18T04:52:16.388-07:00

This site has helped me cope. I have been with my gf about 2 months now. It was a fairy tale at first.she even moved back to ohio to be with me from TX. It was a matter of time till she started not feeling well and its been confirmed she is pregnant. Somewhere around 6 wks. We find out in 2 wks. Anyhow, I cant seem to do anything right no matter how friendly I try to be to her about things. I take care of her, love her, take her out, serve her juice/soda etc and she is evil. She claims she "just doesnt feel like being touched" AT ALL. I feel like a friend and not a bf anymore. I cant cuddle with her when she sleeps or anything. no touch of the hand, of course no sex, and she dont even call me baby/honey anymore. Its killing me inside and its so hard to hang tough! :-(